Made in Japan, Outsourced Globally

I received one of those "write in your unique response, send to 10 friends, and you'll be lucky for life!" sort of questionnaires. Instead of responding to that one, I thought I could voluntarily torture those who happen to stumble upon my blog (by default or by accident).

1. What is your father's mother's favorite pet's name?
2. Have you been so hammered that you drank yourself to oblivion, spilled your deepest darkest secrets, and couldn't even walk any more so you kissed the pavement at 3am in front of your friend's apartment?
3. Have you ever been attracted to the same sex?
4. How about Kylie Manogue?
5. Um... Jon Lovitz?
6. Spell onomoto... whatever that word is that describes words that sound like it
7. Have you ever started drinking before noon? (if you are a New Yorker, you can skip this. We already know)
8. What website do you start your day with?
9. Are you more like Dilbert or Dogbert? (hint: answer the question - do you want to conquer the world or be a cubicle slave?)
10. If your fate was narrowed down to the following, which would you choose: 1) contract mad cow disease, 2) you are a kobe beef waiting to be slaughtered while being fed beer and massaged all day
11. Have you eaten at local hawker stands in a different country and not suffered diarrhea?
12. What is your favorite Monty Python episode/movie?
13. Are you my buddy?
14. Do your ears hang low?
15. And finally, do you promise not to send this out to 10 of your friends, therefore, ending the chain of happiness in the cyber world?

Thanks for playing.

I happen to think this is quite funny.... And I'll be the first to admit that my knowledge of the world and cultures is unbalanced and full of question marks as well. But just as much as the US gets bashed for it, there are just as many people who would utter an uncomfortable "hee hee" outside of the US.

Maps are a great way to project how we perceive things. Case in point:



I tried finding the exaggerated and misshapen map, only proportionate to the GDP size of the nation. It's a fantastic map that depicts a ballooned up borders of the US, Western Europe, and Japan; a mid-sized Middle East; and a shribbled up Africa and an emaciated Latin America. I have to look for it again some time...

I found this forward from a friend pretty hilarious, and I think most office creatures like myself do as well.

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like this (mind you, this is most amusing for the generation that doesn't 'fully get' computers):

Costello calls to buy a computer from Abbott

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals and track expenses. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT: Click on "START"............

An unexpected reunion – Duncan was in town, so I had to go see him. He was my flatmate in Hong Kong. Can’t believe it’s already been a year! We just picked up as if we’ve never parted (Aww...).


From the misadventures in Wan Chai to the beachy weekends in Sai Kung to even the tumultuous tsunami holiday in Phuket, we make a pretty good duo in almost any occasion. I smell another reunion coming up when he visits again in July.


Rainy London. Baa... Dunc models my polka-dot umbrella. (Isn't he adorable?)


Musicians at Covent Garden.

From England with Love XOXO,
Saki

A Valentine's surprise on my desk yesterday. So happy :)

The details of my life are quite inconsequential... Very well, where do I begin?

I am starting to get the hang of driving in England and reduced the incidence of being honked at to only twice a day. I’m less freaked out, but still, the British driving is fairly confusing to me – there’s a whole bunch of police speeding cameras, so you need to drive slowly, yet most people are hell on wheels at every chance they can speed. And as an added bonus, most roads only have single lanes. I’m not being paranoid or crazy – there were a couple cars that left me in the dust at 80mph at a 40mph zone yesterday morning. And then I got stuck behind a lorry, going at 30mph today.


The Nissan Micra – my little powder-blue buddy. It's cute, isn't it?


Ah... yes, the countryside. I’m definitely in the Old English countryside. It’s really peaceful and green. I’m staying in a small town called Cottingham at the moment. It really has the cozy and quaint farm community feel.


The cute homes along the road. I pass by here every day.


I love this sign. Don’t know why, but it makes me smile.


And what’s a countryside without the natural shag carpet grazing the field?


A view from the top – a local church.


And the ever-so-symbollic red telly booths.

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas any more.

You know you’re in an area where people rarely mix, when you get the racial slurs thrown at you for not looking like, well, them. Not knowing the area too well, I don’t bother getting involved, because it’s either A) dangerous, or B) has an adverse effect by showing my irritation.

I wasn’t expecting open arms, but it isn’t particularly pleasant when I’m in the middle of England and some teenagers are screaming “You chinky!” out of the car at me. Or some delinquent 12-year-olds smoking fags at the train station are chirping, “Hey Ting Tong! Ting Tong! You got some light?” If I was the mother, I would have smacked the kid right there.

My colleagues are more worldly and don’t gawk at me as if they have never seen a Japanese person (or Asian). But I feel a little self-conscious when I step into town. (London, of course, is not a part of this story). It’s not always negative attention, but it still makes me self-conscious. I was sitting down at the hotel lounge, when 4 businessmen (one of them was a Singaporean) were stealing glances and trying to guess which nationality I was. Yes, I can hear your conversation. I speak English too.

I find half of this amusing, and the other half a pondering of whether I should even try to inform the other party of what I am. It’s none of their business, really.

I’m just me, and I’m a whole lotta’ attitude.

Okay, the eagle has officially landed in England. What greeted me at Birmingham Airport at 7:30 in the morning was a rather dreary weather and a smiling driver with a placard with my name on it.

Honestly, I didn't know what to expect. While the driver cheerily went on his way along the motorway, all I could think of was "Left, left, left." It was going to take a little getting used to. Especially when I had to be the one behind the wheel pretty soon. We passed by some green fields. Lots of trees. Sheep. Oh, and some more sheep. It had the quiet charm of the English country side. But my surprise came a little later that day...

By the end of the day, I was exhausted, overcaffeinated, and barely dragging my feet across the ground. And then came the biggie: the car. I will skip the embarrassment in the details, but I basicallly had to ask the rental place to take back their car and give me an automatic car instead. Yes, stooopid Americans don't know how to drive a geary. What's even worse, I really haven't had experience driving on the left-hand side of the road and looping on the roundabouts. (btw, I cannot stand those bloody roundabouts). I drove to the hotel with all the nerve-ends sticking out, because, quite frankly, theoretical and pragmatic driving are two different things. Left. Left. Left. Oh, bloody roundabouts...

However, the next morning, I somehow managed to turn up at the office in one piece. And my eyes couldn't help but wander at the side of the road, as I went down the most beautiful country road. The fields were flowing freely, and even the open space that unraveled in front of me like a quilt of different shades of green took my breath away. All in the light of the pink-ish, amber sky that is gently waking and nudging the baby-blue sky. Sheeps dotted the fields; the thin, branching trees; and the distant rooftops and chimneys of a neighboring town added to the landscape of a perfect morning. It was absolutely charming.

Well, enough with the dreaminess. I would be lying if I didn't say that I am still a little culture shock from the move. I felt less culture shock when I was in HK. It's funny how things work out that way.

... it's Tuesday night! Scott Tworek ft. Jim Kelly (Shad Tidler presents)!!!



It's becoming a regular show, and the boys have big plans (so I hear). Besides his consulting skillz, Scott is a socially responsible citizen who drinks for the (volleyball) team - an arrangement made with the local pub to support children (or something like that). Jim is a po', hard-working law student by day and, well, Jim by night. Puts on a pretty good show. Their 'Jameson song' is highly recommended (maybe 2-3 times per night. Each one gets progressively better).




"It's like an AIESEC heaven here," someone said. "It's like the most scandalous people in AIESEC and alumni gather here to scope each other out." ha.

At the end of the night, Scott and Jim had some special guests on stage. "It was the best performance yet!" exclaimed Amanda, a crazy fan who kept on eye-ing Jim with oogly dreamy looks.


Oh yes. Firebreathing was a big hit.

Packed everything and shipped them off to the UK on Monday. Despite the last minute packing, things went smoothly.

The only problem is, I didn' t get to leave.

I'm still here, while all my stuff are already across the Atlantic. Did all my farewells and the tetris mambo to perfection in my suitcase and garment bag. Now, it's a discombobulated mess on the floor of Randy's apartment.

Oh well... I leave on Sunday, and the free international flight wines should wash away the discomfort of the awkward farewell-then not leaving-and then leaving again.